Birthday!

Luke turned 26 last Saturday, October 30. Last year, when he turned 25, I had wanted to surprise him with a big quarter-century party, but with a new baby around it just didn't happen. This year, however, I pulled it off. Our dear friends the Niles agreed to host, and last week was spent in secret phone calls, visits and much conspiratorial discussion. It was exhausting! Luke gave us quite a bit of trouble trying to actually get him to the party - he wanted to come home and stack firewood instead. Silly man. ;) But we managed to get him there, and he was completely surprised!

Don't worry, no harm came to him, though there had been some talk of throwing a pillowcase over his head and beating him with wiffle ball bats. But no one tried anything violent. Instead, he was decorated with leis.

 

The ribbon says, "I am 2!" Apparently there was also an "I am 6!" ribbon but it was misplaced before the party. So Luke got to be 2 all night. Our friend Scott thought that was a good idea, as he told me beforehand that he thinks Luke is getting self-conscious about his age. Again, silly man.

Luke enjoyed his thoughtful gifts, as well as the wrapping paper. I don't know why he thinks he's getting older. Maybe he really is 2. ;) (This is only the last in a long line of pictures of Luke with gift wrap of some sort on his head. I think we have a picture from each of the Niles girls' parties of Luke with wrapping paper, bags, or bows on his head.) For the third time... silly man. ;)

 As usual, Clara was the belle of the ball. She got to stay up late playing with friends, stole some of her Daddy's decor, and got her very fashionable beads from somewhere, I have no idea where. She loved walking around the house swinging the long necklaces back and forth.

It was so much fun to celebrate my wonderful husband with sweet friends that have been such a blessing to us over the past year. We had a huge, yummy dinner (7 lbs of pot roast, 11 lbs of sweet potatoes made into casserole, and 4.5 lbs of roasted broccoli, along with crusty bread and a big green salad), watched a hilarious slideshow of Luke, put together by Lauren Niles (I'll try to see if I can post it later), and enjoyed each others' company.

Happy birthday honey! I love you more than anything and am more thankful for you every day!

Breakfast!

Since we arrived here Friday night, Luke was with us our first two mornings, which was wonderful! He would head out to feed the horses while I got Clara up, then come in and feed the dogs while I got breakfast ready for the humans. But Monday morning he had to leave early for work, so Clara and I were on our own. I admit, I was a little nervous and wasn't sure how it would all work. Breakfast for 9 animals and 2 people is a bit of a production.

The five horses each have their own grain bucket in the barn. They get grain and supplements in the morning, and the oldest guy, Dan, gets his grain wet and mushy to make it easier for him to eat. Then, a bale and a half of hay have to be put in the feeders out in the big pasture to supplement the little grass that is left this time of year.

After three days of feeding on our own, Clara and I have a system down. First we head to the barn and make up the grain for the horses. Then Clara goes in the backpack and we put grain in Charlie and Jubil's buckets (they're always the first in the barn, and their stalls are farthest inside). Once we're ready we call the horses in. As they come in, we shut them each in their little areas and give the other three their grain. After everyone is shut in and munching happily, we close up the grain bins, take Clara out of the backpack and head over to the EZ-go. Luke has been loading the hay in the back for us before he leaves, which is wonderful! We drive through the pasture, up to the feeders, and Clara sits in the back with the hay while I prop the feeders open and fill them. Once we're done we drive back down, let the horses out of their stalls (they're done eating by this time) and fill any water buckets that are getting low. Then we head back to the house.

Once inside, Clara goes in her high chair while I get breakfast for the dogs. Jeb gets very excited about food to the exclusion of any awareness of little people, so Clara needs to be up out of the way so she doesn't get knocked over. Both dogs get kibble, several vitamins and other supplements, and a little wet food to top it all off. Jeb wolfs his down as fast as possible. Fanny eats daintily and rarely finishes.

The cats are the easiest - their bowl of dry food just has to be refilled, and if one of them is around begging, they get some wet food. Otherwise, they're on their own.

Whew! Feeding all those animals can sure make a person hungry! Once they're satisfied Clara and I dig into our own breakfasts - usually some combination of oatmeal, yogurt and applesauce. Mmmmm, full bellies all 'round.

Gould Ranch

Several years ago, I blogged about the fun Luke and I had at "Camp DuBoff" while house sitting for some friends. Now that we have a baby and a dog of our own, I assumed our house sitting days were over. I should just learn not to assume. Some clients of Luke's and good friends of ours asked us back in the summer if we would ever consider house sitting for them, as they've had trouble finding good people to stay here when they visit their son and his family in California. I was a little dubious of the proposition at first, but we decided to give it a shot, so here we are! We arrived Friday evening and, I admit, by Saturday morning I thought we had made a huge mistake. The house is BIG, not babyproof in any way, shape or form, Clara slept horribly (as did I) Friday night and Saturday morning got knocked over by the very friendly, but very large black lab, Jeb. The Cairn Terrier, Fanny, is a watch dog extraordinaire - she sees and hears things even when they aren't there! Her bark woke Clara once in the night and then scared Clara to the point of frantic tears early Saturday afternoon. I was seriously regretting our decision and wondering how we'd survive the next ten days.

But Clara had a great nap Saturday afternoon, and things have been much better ever since. I think we will not only survive, but greatly enjoy our stay here at the Gould's beautiful home. Along with Jeb and Fanny, there are two cats, Crash and Jemmer, who look remarkably alike except for the fact that Crash has long hair and Jemmer's is short. I have been amazed at the cats' patience with Clara, who is fascinated by them and follows them around the house saying, "Mow? Mow?" (pronounced like meow without the "e") Jemmer especially has been extremely tolerant, allowing Clara to "share" her toy balls with him, pet him all over, and put her face right down next to his with intense delight. She has done a good job being gentle, but still I don't know many cats who would simply sleep through her happy squeals directly in their ears.

In addition to the four house pets, there are five horses: Dan, Charlie, Tuffy, Jubil and Mercedes (Mercy). Most of these horses have been with Pat and Roger for most of their lives! The horses are just as much a part of the family as the other animals, and they are one of the main reasons we are here. Being older, they all have their quirks and some have had health issues, so it makes Pat nervous when a "non-horse person," who may not know if something is wrong, stays here to house sit.

Clara, of course, adores the horses and squeals whenever she sights them. Riding on the EZ-go to take their hay up to the pasture every morning is a big highlight of her day. Driving the tractor and manure spreader with Luke yesterday was also a huge hit - there were major tears when the job was all done and it was time to get off.

Friday and Saturday were rainy and blustery, but today was better and the weather is supposed to be nice the rest of the week. Although the house is fascinating in its own right (originally built in the 1880s with a new wing - where our bedrooms are - that almost doubled the size of the house), we are looking forward to spending time outside enjoying the beautiful property.

Pictures will be coming once we get home to take them off the camera. For now, it's time for bed!

Remembering....

Though you probably don't know it, today is the official day for pregnancy and infant loss awareness. This is a topic it seems no one knows how to address and so many parents end up grieving in silence and isolation. Please take a moment today to pray for all the parents who have lost a little one through miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death within the first year. Chances are, this group includes at least one person you know, though you may not be aware of their loss (approximately one out of every five women has suffered at least one miscarriage).

In December of 2007 Luke and I lost our first baby to what is known as a "missed miscarriage." I carried our little one for three weeks after the ultrasound revealing there was no heartbeat until I finally miscarried the baby on January 8, 2008. Our precious babe would have been 2 1/2 this Christmastime.

In the midst of our grief, God brought me this song by Michael Card, from his CD of lullabies, "Sleep Sound in Jesus." It is meant to be sung at a baby dedication, but to me it spoke of a peace I yearned for, and have mostly found, knowing my child is held safely in the love and Promise of Christ.

Wordless Ones

In your loving arms we lay
This wordless one so new
The incarnation of our love
We dedicate to you

Hopeless, yet so full of hope

We make a solemn vow
Not knowing when the time will come
Not even knowing how
And though it seems we try to make
A promise that is true
We really only claim for them
The Promise that is you

In your loving arms we lay
This wordless one so new
The incarnation of our love
We dedicate to you

The holy sleep which falls so deep
A blessing from above
Will now embrace our little one
In simple trusting love
We offer you this child
Who's only ours for just awhile
How could we keep it back from you
When you gave your only child?

In your loving arms we lay
This wordless one so new
The incarnation of our love
We dedicate to you

Though I am thankful for the peace God has given us both, I will always miss you sweet babe. I can't wait to meet you in Heaven someday!

What Has Surprised Me

When Clara was little (as in, only a few weeks or months old) people asked me all the time, "What has surprised you about being a parent?"

Honestly, I was stumped for an answer. I don't mean this in a stuck-up way, because I certainly don't have all the answers and there were definitely times I had plenty of questions, but not much surprised me when I became a parent.

I think there are some stock answers to the question, such as: "I never knew I could love something this much," or, "I never knew I could be this tired and still function," or, "I never knew babies ate so much/went through so many diapers/etc....." But really and truly, none of that surprised me. When I told people that, I got lots of incredulous looks. I've been told motherhood looks "natural" on me, and I suppose that's true.

This past month, though, I have had my first BIG surprise as a parent. At first it was just a vague feeling in the back of my mind. But it slowly got stronger. The first time the thought actually crystallized in my head, I was shocked. You could have knocked me over with a feather. It was so contrary to everything I have ever pictured about my family and myself as a parent. When I expressed this wild thought to Luke, I couldn't believe I was actually saying it, that these words were actually coming out of my mouth.

What was this unthinkable thought that blew me out of the water?

I could be happy with just one. This one would be enough.

Perhaps this does not seem so revolutionary to some of you, but for as long as I can remember I have wanted a big family. Lots of kids. I slowly worked on Luke while we were dating and engaged until his "ideal family size" went from 2 kids to 2-3 to 3-4 to "about 4." I have always felt sorry for only children, having no siblings to play with, and assumed that since I love kids I'd have lots of them. For a long time I thought only children were spoiled and that it was better for kids to have siblings. Lately I have been rethinking many of these assumptions.

Clara is such a joy. She is the cutest, sweetest, smartest, funniest little girl I know. She has been a "good baby" right from the beginning. Sure, we've had rough patches, but even while we were going through them there have always been shining moments of joy and laughter to keep us going. She puts a smile on our faces at the end of a long day. Her huge smile is what motivates me to get up in the morning after a long night (I don't sleep well). She can brighten up any moment of the day in a million ways. Her hugs and kisses melt our hearts. She is truly the light of our lives.

I could be completely happy just being her mom. Seriously, who wouldn't be happy with just this little girl?!

In fact, it is hard to imagine adding another child to the mix. It makes me sad to think that another child would necessarily mean less one on one time with my sweet girl. Less focused attention from her Daddy, who already wishes he had more time with her than he does. Fewer opportunities to just sit and watch her play, learn and discover the world around her.

Furthermore, Clara is such a blessing, could we really be so lucky twice? Three times? What if we had another baby and it just wasn't that fun? Or it was really crabby? Or - here's the kicker - what if it was just as cute and wonderful as Clara? What in the world would we do then? As Luke said to Clara at dinner the other night, "We'd just burst!!!" A person can only stand so much incredible cuteness at once, I have to think.

I hear a certain someone waking up from her nap, singing away in her room, so I need to end. I should say, though, that I don't feel our family is complete. Luke and I both believe there are more children in our future. Whether they will be biological, foster, adoptive or some other kind of kid, we don't know, but we do know they're out there somewhere ahead of us. But for now, we are very happy with our sweet girl. And I will always have a better understanding of parents who decide to only have one child.

And now I'm off to get some baby hugs. :)

Tonight's reaction to the instructions, "Smile for the camera!"

Words This Week

"Apple"
"Up" (while climbing the stairs at our friends' house)
"Down" (on same stairs)

And valiant attempts at "Karoline" and "Becca."

Applesauce...

over here...

Clara's Words

I've always heard people ask what a baby's first word was, or when he or she started talking. I never thought much about that. But now, I realize how silly it is to ask what the first word was. Clara has been communicating well since she was a baby. At 10 months she started signing consistently and our communication improved. Now, at 13 months, she still signs and has begun to use some words consistently and others off and on. I realized that I'm not sure when exactly she started talking. It wasn't a sudden thing. It has been a gradual process, with lots of starts and stops along the way. That said, here is a list of Clara's "words" - some that she uses often, others that she has only said a couple of times:

Mama (mostly combined with the sign for "please" when she wants something, but used other times as well)
Dada (used like "mama" but when talking to Luke)
uh oh (her favorite word at the moment)
shoe
applesauce (she said this one for the first time this morning, clear as day!)
Yeehaw! (guess who taught her that one!)

Animal noises (many of these have been around longer than most of the words):
woof woof (sounds more life "fff, fff" - she loves the "f" sound!)
bah bah (for chicken)
rr rr (rooster)
nnnnn (in pitch for horse/pony)
mmmmmoo (cow)
lulululu (peacock)
ha ha (goose)
baaa (sheep)
ooww (kitty cat)
(these last 3 are not as regular, they're more in progress)

Words she has said once or twice:
Papa
Gramma (gah...MA!)
Amen (sounds more like mama at the moment)
Ni ni (night night)
Buh buh (bye bye)
hat
ears
eye

Besides these words, she talks in her own language constantly. Our house is filled with chatter! She has lots to say and it is so fun to hear some of it becoming distinguishable from the babble!

Scrumptious Yogurt and Butter...

... over at Good Food. Mmmmm...

Discovering Again Why I Ride

I have been riding horses for over 20 years now. That's hard to believe! My first riding lesson was a gift for my 7th birthday. So the 27th birthday I just celebrated was a milestone in many ways! I don't think anyone could have guessed 20 years ago how big of an impact horses would have on my life. Without them, I would not be the person I am today. I probably wouldn't be married to my husband. I most certainly would not be living where I am. I can't even begin to imagine all the ways my life would be different.

When I was little, I rode simply because I loved horses. Through high school, I enjoyed the friends I made and I also did chores at the farm, but it was still the passion for the animal that kept me coming back every day, getting up at the crack of dawn (or earlier) for shows, and spending every spare minute I could riding, thinking about, or just being with horses.

After college, I took a job as a trainer, assistant manager, riding teacher, and pretty much all-around right-hand-woman to my friend and high school trainer at her new farm. I threw myself into the work, fully committed to my job and thankful I could make money doing something that was also a passion (an aside - other than babysitting, I have never held a job that did not include horses!). I regularly worked 70+ hour weeks, was on call any time of the day or night, and did everything from patching up wounds (or helping the vet do so) to polishing up expensive show horses before they went in the ring. Every "non-horse person" I knew thought I was crazy. But to Luke and I, when you work with animals, they are your life. They don't take a break from living or having needs, so you don't take a break from caring for them.

I also trained, often working with and riding five or more horses each day. The constant changing and adjusting to each different horse and each different issue was interesting and challenging. I learned a lot and am thankful for the experience I had.

But somewhere along the way I lost the joy. The pure, unadulterated love of horses I felt as a child. The reason I started riding in the first place. Somehow, training, riding, and working at the farm became more about pleasing my boss and proving myself to be a wonderful employee and friend than simply about the horses. I strove to always fulfill and attempt to exceed her high expectations - setting myself up for failure and her for disappointment. Don't get me wrong, I still enjoyed the work. But I also had this nagging knowledge and fear that I could never be quite good enough. Instead of being the best I could be, I wanted to be perfect.

Due in part to the fact that I had a baby and did not want to work full-time anymore, and also probably due in part to these unrealistic expectations that didn't allow my commitment of anything less than everything to be enough, I no longer work at that job or with horses in any professional capacity. Our personal horses live at a friend's house, where they are deliriously happy, having more room and grass than they had ever known before. I get to ride once or twice a week.

At first, I have to admit, this riding was boring to me. Of course, I was excited to ride my own horse again, but always riding the same horse was a little dull after being used to riding so many different horses in a week. I always enjoyed trail rides, but going out on the trail every ride got a little old. I felt like I wasn't "working on things" like I was used to doing in an arena 80% of the time.

But over the past weeks and months, I have started to catch glimpses of why I began riding in the first place. Exploring new fields and trails with my husband for an hour and a half is an absolute delight. Instead of being focused on correctly executing a complicated maneuver (and being frustrated when the horse and I can't get it "right"), I am pleased with one step in the right direction. I'm no longer worried about how much I have to accomplish with this particular horse in the next 11 days before it leaves - I know, with my own horse, there will always be tomorrow. We are on a journey together, which has no end or limit, only ever-increasing magnitudes of communication and unity.

I am slowly peeling back the onion, and last night it felt like I got to the core. Since our friends (and babysitters!) are gone on a trip, I was riding alone for the first time in awhile. Paladin and I trotted several familiar fields, and then discovered, through a hedgerow, a huge expanse of green hayfield, completely hidden from the road and any nearby houses, closed in from everything. We made our way into this little Eden and cantered its perimeter, perfectly in tune, rolling along together. And I thought, "ahh, yes, this is why I ride."

I'm joining Mommy....

over at Good Food, and I just blogged my first post! Come take a look, I don't think you'll be disappointed. :)

Being One is Fun!

Having a one-year-old is a blast. Clara is at such a fun age, straddling the line between baby and big kid, and we are enjoying both aspects to the fullest. I love the sweet moments she cuddles in and nurses contentedly when she's sleepy. I also love being tackled by a smiling little monster and rolling around in the yard giggling together!

Careening around the yard holding on to my fingers is currently her favorite activity. But every once in awhile she takes a break and sits down! She likes to ride her "truck" for a while: 

She also loves to hold Sadie's ball and throw it or simply give it to Sadie - she thinks it's hilarious when Sadie gently takes it out of her hand (as you can tell, Sadie is oftentimes forced to be more patient than she would like! I remind both my girls - and myself - daily that patience is a virtue.)

 

When Daddy gets home, he is always commandeered into the role of "walker" while I make dinner. Inevitably Clara ends up with something on her head whenever Daddy's around... 

Today's break in our mid-day exercise involved another fun activity: "driving" the lawn mower. As you can see, it took a lot of concentration!

Ah, a bit of rest after a long day's work. (Note the tongue - it has been hanging out of her open mouth most of the day due to a nasty cold. Although even when she doesn't have a cold, she still thinks it's pretty funny to stick her tongue out!)

Our Daily Pilgrimage

Clara loves being outdoors. I don't know if all young children go through a phase where they would rather spend every waking moment outside, but our little girl is definitely there. She wakes up in the morning, gets, dressed, and heads to the kitchen door. The story is the same after both naps and any other time she happens to be inside. She'll grab the closest hand and head to the door, asking, "aa-AH?" on the way and signing "please" when we get there. A negative response results in heartbroken sobs and floods of tears.

Needless to say, we've been spending a lot of time outdoors. We have lots of favorite activities to choose from, but not a single day has gone by in the past week without this one special trip, often taken multiple times a day. Holding on to the fingers of whoever happens to be with her at the moment, Clara will walk purposefully past the hammock, the camp chairs, and the lawn mower (all favorite places to sit and watch the cars go by), shaking her head in a vehement "no" if stopping is suggested. She heads up the slight incline in the backyard, under the crab apple and maple trees, to the back garden. The last of my green beans are hanging on, the butternut squash are about ready to harvest and, most important on Clara's list, the fall raspberries are ripe and plentiful. We had a decent harvest from last year's canes in the summer, but this year's canes are much more bountiful and a good number of berries ripen every day. Good thing, too!

Once we arrive at the garden, Clara plops down on the ground and starts "pleasing" frantically, interspersed with lots of pointing and exclamations of "ah, AH! Om. Ah. Om." It is my job to pick berries and hand them to her to be gobbled up as fast as I pick. If I'm not going fast enough she'll often crawl to the nearest cane and try to reach some for herself.

I'm so thankful my daughter is learning the delights of fresh fruit, straight from the source. Nothing makes me happier than being able to indulge her voracious appetite for raspberries from my own backyard. (To be honest, she loves bananas too, which will never be local or fresh in New England. But hey, it's all a work in progress.) So as long as the raspberries keep coming, you can bet we'll be making our daily pilgrimage to our own little Mecca of deliciousness.

Summertime is for... cold salads!

Between the local farmer's market and my garden, delicious fresh produce abounds this time of year! All this beautiful food inspires me to be creative in the kitchen. But with hot weather and no air conditioning, heating up my kitchen never sounds like a very good idea. Grilling is always wonderful, and we do that a fair amount. But lately, we have been eating a lot of cold salads. What I love about these scrumptious dishes is I can prepare them in the morning, when the house is still cool and Clara is napping, then whip them out at dinner time with no prep necessary. I also love that they provide a well-rounded, filling yet refreshing supper that leaves us saying, "Mmmmm, that was good..."

But enough talk about them, let's get down to business! Here are a few of the salads we've been enjoying lately:

Raw Kale Salad - we first tried this on a recommendation from my mom, and it is delicious! We put in mandarin oranges, dried cranberries, and raw almonds.

Lentil and Brown Rice Salad

This one is based off a recipe from my Better Homes & Gardens cookbook.

1/2 c brown rice
1/2 c dry lentils
2 c water
1/2 c shredded carrot
1/4 c diced onion
(1/2 c diced red or green pepper - optional, I didn't have any)

3 T olive oil
3 T lemon juice
1/2 t finely shredded lemon peel
1 T chopped fresh basil
1/4 t salt

Simmer rice in water for 20 minutes. Add lentils, cover, and simmer for 20-25 minutes more, until lentils and rice are al dente (you don't want them mushy). Remove from heat, let stand 5-10 minutes and then drain and rinse with cold water. Combine in a large bowl with remaining salad ingredients.

Combine dressing ingredients in a screw-top container and shake well til combined. Pour over salad and toss to coat. Cover and chill until dinner! (Best if it has at least 3 hours or so.) Serve garnished with tomato wedges and cheese slices if desired.

Note: this salad is so easy to "bulk up" for more people - simply increase the lentils and rice and add a little more dressing. The amounts are really flexible.

Barley and Bean Salad

Also based on a BH&G recipe.

1 c barley
1 1/4 c chicken broth or water
1-2 c cooked garbanzo beans (how much you add depends on how "beany" you like your salad - I use the larger amount. You can also just use 1 15-oz can if you don't normally cook your own.)
1 cup frozen peas
1 cup chopped cucumber
1/4 c diced onion
1 T snipped fresh rosemary (or 1 t dried)
1/2 c Italian Vinaigrette*

Simmer barley in broth or water til cooked through but still chewy, 20-30 min (depending on your barley). Combine with remaining ingredients in a large mixing bowl and toss to coat with dressing. Cover and chill until ready to serve.

*You can use any italian-style dressing you want. Here is the recipe for the dressing I used:
1/3 c olive oil (or oil of your choice)
1/3 c vinegar (I used red wine, you can use white wine or whatever you prefer)
2 t sugar
1/2 t dried oregano
1/2 t paprika
1 t mustard
2 T parmesan cheese
1/4 t celery seed
1 clove garlic, minced or pressed

Combine all ingredients in a screw-top jar and shake til well mixed. This makes more than what you need for the salad, so use the rest on fresh greens, as a marinade for chicken, whatever. :)

Waldorf Quinoa Salad

3/4 c quinoa
1/4 c millet
(or omit the millet and use 1 c quinoa)
2 1/4 c water
1 large apple, chopped

3/4 - 1 c red seedless grapes, halved
1/2 c raisins
dash salt
3/4 c walnuts, toasted and chopped

3 T lemon juice
2 T olive oil


Rinse quinoa well. Combine quinoa, millet and water in a saucepan, bring to boiling, reduce heat and simmer until just cooked through, 20-25 min. Remove from heat, fluff with a fork, cover and let sit for 5-10 min. Drain and rinse with cold water. Combine with everything except walnuts in a large mixing bowl. Drizzle with lemon juice and olive oil and toss to coat. Cover and chill. Just before serving, add walnuts and toss well. (You can add the walnuts earlier, they'll just get a little soft.)

I made this one for the first time on Saturday out of things I happened to have on hand. I'm still playing with it and thinking about maybe adding some yogurt to it next time. Craisins would also be good. If you make it, please let me know and share any ideas you have!

Black Bean and Corn Salad

My mom has always been the master of this salad. Like her, mine doesn't really have a recipe. This is one of our all-time favorite summer salads though, and we make it often with lots of variations. Below is a rough sketch of what I do.

1-2 cans black beans (or 2-4 c cooked black beans)
2-3 ears corn, kernels cut off (or about 1 c frozen corn kernels)
1/2 an onion, chopped
Any combination of the following:
Diced tomatoes (2-3)
1 red pepper, diced
1 avocado, peeled and diced (our favorite addition!)
1/2 c cheddar cheese, cubed
1/4 - 1/2 c chopped fresh cilantro or basil (we prefer cilantro, but I made it with basil over the weekend and it was good too)

Juice of 1 lime
A couple tablespoons olive oil
dash salt
Any of the following:
balsamic vinegar
cumin
chili powder

Combine black beans, corn, onion and any of the optional additions you're using in a large mixing bowl. Drizzle with dressing, toss to coat, cover and chill.

Here is one more I haven't tried yet but want to, again from BH&G:

Brown Rice and Vegetable Salad

1 1/2 c cooked brown rice
1 1/2 c coarsely chopped tomato
2 medium carrots, julienned (1 c)
1/2 c frozen peas
1/4 c thinly sliced green onions (2) (I often sub regular onion since I don't keep these on hand)
1 T snipped fresh parsley
1 T snipped fresh dill or basil
Lettuce leaves

3 T olive oil
3 T red wine vinegar
2 t dijon-style mustard
1 1/2 t sugar
1/8 t pepper

In a large bowl stir together salad ingredients (not lettuce leaves). Combine dressing ingredients in a screw-top jar and shake well. Pour over salad and toss lightly to coat. Cover and chill. To serve, line a salad bowl with lettuce leaves. Transfer salad to bowl.

Yum!

The timing of this post was inspired by Kelly - if you want more cold salad ideas, head on over to her Coldsaladpalooza!

A Full Lap

Clara was given many stuffed animals before she was born. I put most of them away, and have slowly brought them out as she has gotten older, but I still have some stashed in her closet. On Saturday while we were playing in her room, she spotted a crazy striped lion that one of my sweet students bought for her, and instantly started signing "please" and pointing to it. So I got it down, she played with it a bit and gave it lots of big hugs and kisses. I didn't think much of it.

Sunday Clara crawled in the living room while we were getting breakfast ready and soon we heard her squealing loudly in delight. Luke peeked around the corner and started laughing at her, swinging the lion back and forth over his head by his mane.

Sunday evening after bath Luke carried her in the living room while I was getting her pjs ready, and she again grabbed the lion and hugged it tightly. She didn't want to let go. She held onto it while I carried her in her room, rubbed lotion all over her, and put her diaper and pjs on. She was still hugging it tightly as we sat down to nurse.

When I put her down to sleep, she was still clutching the lion tight as could be with both arms wrapped around it. For both naps today she has wanted to hold the lion while nursing and has taken it to bed with her. Apparently she is in love. :) When she woke up from her morning nap, she was also playing with her pony and wanted to hold that for after-nap nursing as well as the lion and her mini blankie. My lap was very, very full. :)

When life gives you overripe bananas...

... make banana cookies! I had just one banana that was getting brown and a little too soft even for Clara, but I didn't want to waste it. I thought about making a small batch of banana bread, but wanted something healthier that Clara could snack on as an alternative to cheerios (which she loves). I have found this website helpful throughout Clara's introduction to solid foods, so I searched and found just what I was looking for: banana and oat teething biscuits! I (of course) modified the recipe a little bit, here's my version:

Mix together:
2/3 c oat flour (i.e. rolled oats coarsely ground in a coffee grinder)
1/3 c quinoa flakes (just because I had them - I'd do all oats too, or add in any other grain or flour you wish)
1/2 t baking powder
teeny tiny dash salt
dash each nutmeg and ginger (cinnamon and cardamom were also recommended, I didn't try them though)

Mix together and then add to dry ingredients:
1 overripe mashed banana
enough water to make 1/2 c liquid
dash vanilla extract

Mix well and drop onto a parchment-lined cookie sheet by the teaspoonful. Mush flat (mine were about the size of a silver dollar). Bake at 350 for 15-18 minutes or until the edges just turn brown. Remove to wire rack and let cool.

I have to say, they are really quite yummy! (as in, I have snagged my fair share of them too!) They are pretty sweet for not having any sweetener other than the banana. Clara LOVES them. She's not quite ready for them whole, I break them into even smaller pieces for her, but I'm thinking of trying a stick shape next time to see if that's better for her. I'm storing them in the fridge which seems to be working well. These will definitely become a regular around our house, and I'm thinking of other ways to make them too. I may try a savory version next with broccoli and a little cheese. Mmmm....

Daily Things

There are some things that are constant in life. I'm not talking about "big things" like God's love or the fact that there will always be turmoil in some part of the world. I'm talking about daily things. Like dishes. Like shedding (dog owners, you know what I mean). Like dirty clothes. "Chores" that are never truly "done." I came to a realization yesterday - it suddenly hit me that, in all likelihood, I will wash at least one dirty dish every day for the rest of my life. That is a lot of dishwashing!

Each and every day, usually during Clara's morning nap, I sweep all the floors in my house. Six months ago I would go several days sometimes between sweeping, but now that Clara is crawling around everywhere, I spend a much larger portion of my time cleaning floors than I ever have in my life.

No matter what else is going on, the laundry still needs to be done - and in this cloth-diapering house, with a Daddy that works at dirty jobs, that is a minimum of one load per day. The bathroom needs to be cleaned.

Usually, I don't mind these tasks. I love the look of a shiny sink and a clean kitchen; knowing the end result motivates me to keep up on my dishes. I always feel productive while cycling loads of laundry, because I can do something else while it's washing or drying - yay for multitasking! There is something peaceful, relaxing and very rewarding about having a clean and organized home. But while I don't resent the everyday tasks of cooking, cleaning, and doing dishes, I don't always treasure them or make the most of them.

This is the true realization that came to me yesterday: in all the hours I will spend sweeping, doing dishes, folding laundry, what else will I be getting done? How much more benefit could be reaped from this time if, instead of simply thinking of the next task or (worse) mindlessly going about my chores, I spent each moment in prayer. When I wash dishes, I could be thanking God for His loving provision of healthy food for our family, for the time we are able to spend together around the table, and praying for those who have no dishes to wash, who will go hungry tonight. As I sweep the floors, I can be thankful for a home, for a husband who works hard to provide for us, for a little girl who crawls around and makes messes. When I switch the laundry, fold clothes or hang diapers up to dry, I can thank God again for His provision of clothing, I can think of others around the world hanging their clothes to dry, I can pray for those less fortunate who go cold for lack of clothes or who only have one shirt, one pair of pants to wear.

This is a good start. It takes my eyes away from me and my "work" and sets them on God and His faithfulness. On the days when my attitude is not one of cheerfulness or thankfulness it reminds me of the many blessings in my life. But I still want to go one step further. At different times in life I have used daily routines as "hooks" or reminders to pray for specific things. When Clara was brand new I often used her middle-of-the-night nursings to pray for the many mothers and new babies that were born around the same time. Those were such peaceful moments, quiet and prayerful with my little babe in the darkness. I have not decided on all my "hooks" just yet, but here are a few I'm thinking of: when I change Clara's diaper, I can think of and pray for each of my family members, whose pictures are on the wall above her changing table. Each time I clean the bathroom I will pray for our nation and our leaders, for wisdom and God's hand and leading on their lives, for revival in our land. These hooks do not have to be related, they simply have to be linked in your mind.

What are your hooks (perhaps they have developed without you even noticing!)? How are you using each minute of every day for God's kingdom? In what ways can you build a more prayer-full, purposeful way of living?

It's coming in!

I'm SO excited about our garden this year! I was probably a little overzealous with our seed-ordering, but I'm looking forward to seeing how things do and being even more organized for next year. Everything is in now, and I'm just maintaining, weeding as necessary (pretty often, with all the rain we've had!), thinning as the plants get big enough, and watching things grow. Here are some pictures from yesterday:

This is the little spot I had last year where I did tomatoes, basil and zucchini. This year there are 4 kinds of tomatoes (little mama - a roma, sweet 100 cherry, porterhouse beefsteak, and golden mama - a yellow roma that keeps its color when cooked), a row of basil (just starting to sprout + a big plant I got from the nursery), a row of New Zealand spinach and an empty spot right front for planting later in the season for fall greens. The cherry tomato already has one tiny tomato on it! I can't wait for more!!!

This is part of the long bed I spent so much time weeding and digging this spring! My cucumbers are in the back, they have been partially thinned (they need more thinning, but that's my least favorite part of gardening - I hate pulling out healthy seedlings!). In front of them is a row of green beans that just went in last week, so they haven't sprouted quite yet.

The other half of the long bed: a double row of snap peas in the back, carrots in the middle (that just started coming in this week, yay!) and a row of lettuce in the front (the lettuce has barely come in, so I'm not sure if it's going to grow or not... we'll see!).

This is part of the back garden that was a very weedy raspberry patch. You can see on the lefthand side I left a couple of healthier raspberry canes, but most I pulled out. There's still a big patch to the right of this plot. The front row is green beans that didn't come in particularly well (so I planted more up front to see if they do better). The second two rows each have 3 hills of butternut squash that mostly look pretty good right now. I'm really hoping these do well, as we love butternut squash around here (Clara especially)! In between the hills are a couple of asparagus plants a client gave Luke last week - I had to stick them in somewhere and didn't really have anywhere else to put them! I'll probably move them eventually, but this is their temporary home. :)

My raspberries look lovely this year and have LOTS of tiny green berries, so I'm hoping for a good harvest. I think all that weeding I did in the spring paid off!

Our four blueberry bushes also have a fair number of green berries on them, even though I didn't do anything for them this year. I need to be good about picking as they ripen this summer; last summer we lost a good number to birds and bugs. Frozen blueberries are one of Clara's favorite foods (thawed and mixed with oatmeal for breakfast) so I know she's going to love the fresh ones from our bushes. I can't wait to pick them with her!

I look at my yard in a completely different way now: "hmm, where could I put another garden bed?" "what would be a good spot for _____?" Two plants I really wish I had are rhubarb and strawberries. Maybe next year. Also next year I am going to plan ahead and start more things indoors to get a jump on our short growing season here. But for now I am keeping loving watch over my little seedlings and looking forward to harvesting all through late summer.

Oh, and I'm also keeping an eye out for an extra freezer to keep some of our harvest in! If you hear of one in the area, let me know! :)

Prayer of a Budding Gardener

Oh Lord, let my heart be like good soil for You to work in. Let it not be hard, difficult to dig through, resistant to Your hand.

Remove the rocks, O God, though they be many - big boulders of pride, self-sufficiency, arrogance, and smaller (yet more numerous) stones of perfectionism, laziness, stubbornness. Discard the rusty nails of old wounds and grudges held onto. Work the soil of my heart, dig and break up the hardened portions, sift me through Your fingers until there is not a pebble or nail left.

Oh Lord, though the digging be tough and painful, work me through and through until I am completely yielded to You. Let me be soft soil in Your hand.

Proof of Life

Diapers drying.

For an explanation of this series, see Kelly's blog.